Being a good listener is one of those things that sounds simple but is actually really difficult to master.
What is the secret?
You need to listen to the other person.
By that, I mean:
When someone else is talking, give them your entire attention.
Do not spend your time trying to come up with a response to what they are saying.
Do not think about what you should say next.
Do not think about how what they’ve said made you feel.
Actually, just better not to “think”.
Just LISTEN to them.
If there is a lull in the conversation, then prompt them to continue with a question. When listening, its not time for it to shift focus to you. Keep focus on them.
And, as you get better at this, start listening for the things they aren’t saying out loud as loudly as the things they are. Moreso even.
It’s really, really hard to not pull focus back to yourself, to let yourself react. It does get easier though with training and practice.
Originally Posted: https://www.quora.com/What-are-the-characteristics-of-a-really-good-listener-in-a-1-on-1-situation
Originally Posted On: 2016-02-28